Relationships

GOOD THINGS YOU CAN LEARN FROM BAD RELATIONS

Whatever happens, happens for the good might sound quite a clichéd idiom but it’s a fact of life for many who feel a soured relationship leaves behind a few verities of life which can help one in the long run and also a few well learnt lessons which you are not likely to forget in a hurry. Like it makes you realize how important it is to think well before you take a decision as important as marriage. Like Meena Kapoor who is a doctor by profession jokingly says, “ Just because I have had problems with my ex-husband I can’t overlook the good things I have learnt from him, I mean he taught me never to trust a man in my life again”. Like Meena there are many women out there who have experienced and have found their way. Because most of the good lessons in life come with those practical experiences.

But it is a good sign when you are able to look back at the past and laugh about it. Initially the laughter may seem a bit forced and a little rusty but once you are able to see it in perspective you know that even the worst relationship has left a positive impact on you.

When Nisha Shrama married her college sweetheart and later after five years split up with her husband she realized that she had actually mistaken a college infatuation as ab earth shattering case of true love.

At 35 today she is remarried and working as a creative head in an ad agency and feels that the decision she took back then was mature and well thought out, as she started feeling after marriage that she had changed herself and started thinking a lot like her husband. It was only after four years that the realization dawned to her that she had killed her dreams and was now living the life of a person who was completely different from her true self and it was at that point she realized that she had to move on and live life on her terms and so this time she chose someone like minded who would understand her. “Today when I am standing at the top of a heap with a new life, a successful career, I can look at the past with almost a certain kind of fondness. If it wasn’t for that bad relationship, I wouldn’t have been able to appreciate the fabulous relationship I have today,” says Nisha Sharma.

When Kangana Chopra got married at the age of 21 little did she know what she wanted from life. At that point of time marriage was all about what she saw in movies and she expected it to be all play and no work. She jumped at the first marriage proposal that came her way. “The first few months of marriage were blissful and things went the way I wanted them to go but it was only after a year that I realized that the realities of life were much different, as I was married in a joint family, I had a lot of compromises to make and it was then that I felt that a joint family is not like what you see in movies and personally it was not my cup of tea. So I felt that there was no point in carrying on a relation, which was not giving me satisfaction, and so I decided to forgo it and move on. Now I have decided that when I get into a relation it has to be a nuclear family,” states Kangana.

Whether it is learning what you want from life or thinking about a prospective marriage before taking the final plunge, a bitter relationship can also leave you with learning many brutalities in life. A bad marriage can teach a few lessons in life which become a part of an individual’s nature.

So what are the good things you can learn from a bad relationship?

1) Like all other phases in life, this too will pass. In other words all bad things can come to an end.

2) Don’t dream of a grand future. If it happens, great. But in pursuit of a golden dream, don’t mess up your present. It’s a good present that matters.

3) Change is the only constant thing in life. And thank god for that. Imagine being stuck in the situation with no hope of reprieve.

4) You become a much stronger person mentally. After taking on a creep you are ready to take on the world!